The only thing really to know about the Krampus and Perchten procession is that it is a nightmare. It is like a Buffy-level Hellmouth opened up on the Herrengasse and these beasts have come spewing forth, belched from the acrid bowels. I mean! This is Christmas? OK, Europe. 

I nearly lost my mind, for a minute or more? And kids are screaming in equal parts delight and terror and then some of these creatures are all up on the barricades eyes aglow and then some are revving chainsaws and oh god. 

A few months ago I had asked what people here did for Halloween and was told it is not really a thing and in hindsight duh rightly so when there is this horror show to anticipate. 

And yes good ol’ St. Nicholas is there in the mix too, but how can that even compete with horned demons who are rattling chains and waving flares and switching children with bundles of twigs?

Basically why have we not imported this to America?