February 2010
26 posts
3 tags
I studied German for three years in high school.  Why?  Well:  The slackers took Spanish, the AP kids took Russian or Chinese, the pretty people studied French.  I decided, likely on a whim when forced to choose my freshman year, that the weirdo/misfit world of German class was where I wanted, or likely should, be. Maybe it was because I was raised a Lutheran? The class for the majority of the...
Feb 27th
12 notes
2 tags
Feb 27th
Feb 27th
4 tags
This.  Because If I know tweens, there is nothing they are interested in more than jurisprudence. (via)
Feb 26th
3 tags
Feb 26th
3 tags
People on the internet don't want to hear from you...
hugparty: Mike Dressel’s site invites you to ‘get acquainted’ and lists his email. But he doesn’t want to know you. If he did he would email you. It’s just a trap to see how badly you want to know him. His monstrous ego and mighty intellect, they never rest folks. You cannot possibly be good enough to interact with him. Ignore his suggestion to contact him! “Oh, please don’t think...
Feb 26th
4 tags
Dear Internet: After Selleck Waterfall Sandwich and Bea Arthur Mountains Pizza, can someone just build a site that will generate the next [Celebrity] + [Natural Setting] + [Food] meme already? ~M
Feb 26th
3 tags
Feb 25th
3 tags
Feb 22nd
11 notes
3 tags
Feb 20th
3 tags
Q: When the Rapture occurs, how long before my pet is rescued? A: The timing is contingent on the number of subscribers we have in each state/region and travel distance.  Our rescuers know that this is a time sensitive service.  Pets’ lives are at stake.  We will limit the number of subscribers in each zone so that any given rescuer will not be over burdened. Naturally, we must anticipate...
Feb 17th
5 notes
My top three money-making ideas, as developed at a bar while under the influence: Open an acting studio dedicated to teaching the art of being a marketable talent to reenactment shows.  (Why act when you can re-enact?) Monologue karaoke. Perfect the laxative cocktail. (Picture a White Russian, but with ex-lax.) Done and done!  Pay me please?
Feb 13th
3 tags
Feb 11th
4 tags
Feb 10th
2 notes
4 tags
Feb 10th
3 tags
I’m pretty sure a sign of getting older—or at least that I’m getting older—is the inability to be crazy passionate about the current crop of music, to be whipped into a fervor about certain acts, the kind of reactionary defensiveness that leads to lengthy screeds and the bolstering of diminished expectations.  Take, for example, Vampire Weekend, or Taylor Swift, or Lady...
Feb 9th
4 tags
Feb 6th
4 tags
Feb 4th
5 notes
3 tags
Exposing Dickens?  “Pip and Herbert from Great Expectations are among those who really have homosexual leanings, the study by Dr Holly Furneaux of Leicester University claimed.  Often Dickens’ male characters ‘conveniently’ fall in love with the sister of their best friend, which she read as further evidence that he had woven the suggestion of homosexual...
Feb 4th
3 tags
Feb 4th
4 tags
Feb 3rd
7 notes
4 tags
Watching the first episode of Bravo’s “Kell on Earth” I think triggered some sort of public relations PTSD.  I was almost hyperventilating during the list-making, and assembling of seating charts, with unseen clients on the other end of the phone making DEMANDS, the manhandling of talent and press alike. (I wonder how Patty Hearst feels when she sees a machine gun or fatigues?) ...
Feb 3rd
3 notes
3 tags
Feb 3rd
9 notes
4 tags
“Gram Parsons gave a lot of other bands a leg up and was on his own way down as they crested. Or maybe he was getting a little better or a lot better for a moment and was starting to collaborate with Emmylou Harris when he overdosed though in the tragic narrative of drugs and alcohol he died because he had become healthy and then he turned back. Something in a person must want that early...
Feb 2nd
4 tags
Feb 2nd
3 tags
Feb 2nd
3 notes